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You Are Feeling Thinner, Thinner, Thinner 'Mom'ory

What do you mean I am thin?! Well, by golly, ring me up for one of everything, then. Oh, and I'll take the matching bracelet and heels, too! Do you take Amex?

So, there must be one smart woman out there managing the empire of my now-favorite store.

Shop there and you'll lose one dress size instantly! What a novel idea, guaranteeing self-esteem with a trip to the dressing room. Now, I know my size like the back-of-my-hand and I am not deceived easily by sales people (I used to be one). I'm a *, but on a bad day, an *. Well, at my magical happy place, I am a 4!


Yes, you are reading correctly.

Women, come closer and pay attention.

There is a clothing store for us that has defied all clothing stores. Walk in and you are transformed. Maybe it's the lack of ROYGBIV that, too often, confuses us in the monstrosity of the mall. The specialty here is shades and tints, not colors. Talk to the staff and they'll have you believing you should be on a runway. I should get a job there just to learn how they lure the clientele. Is it hypnosis? The women were soft-spoken, perhaps almost monotone.

You are feeling thinner, you are feeling thinner. 

No, I would remember that. 

As I sit here in my size 4 jeans, I think back to that most-fabulous shopping trip. Did the air smell different? Were the mirrors taller like in those fun houses at the amusement park? Was the lighting dimmed to obscure my view of any flesh flapping around? I can't say as I remember anything other than feeling like I just won 'The Biggest Loser'.

It's amazing that it has taken this many years for someone to realize that women would buy more if their egos were stroked a bit (btw, I bought 2 pairs of $88 jeans that day). It's as simple as black-and-white, really....most women would buy a dress because of the smaller size tag (despite the larger price tag).

Now that I think about it, it must be in the way they design their clothes as well as the way they design their 'little helpers ladies' because you actually do look thinner in them, even at home and without the saleswoman's non-critical critique. You feel like a beautiful woman in anything you put on, and why shouldn't you?

See, I should get a job there.

So, thank you, oh worthy one, for the weight loss without all the weights and the boost to my womanhood without all the therapy.

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Just a short thought to get the word out quickly about anything in your neighborhood.
Share something with your neighbors. Write a new post... What's up? Make an announcement, speak your mind, or sell something
Gerald A. Tiernan May 18, 2013 at 12:01 pm
Your barking dog complaint in North Patchogue is handled by Public Safety, Town of Broohaven. CallRead More them at 451-6161 and they will take action. The first time the owners will be warned, the next time they will receive a summons.
Mark Fauci May 17, 2013 at 08:46 am
Don't know what the Town ordnance is, but if you live within the Village of Patchogue, I believeRead More there is a "15 minute rule" in the code. Basically, if the dog is barking for more than 15 continuous minutes, it's a violation subject to a fine. Call public safety at 475-1225. Keep in mind it's probably not their first priority (unless the dog has a bad attitude, and is carrying a weapon), but they will be responsive, eventually.
Michael Sorrentino (Editor) May 13, 2013 at 12:38 pm
Hi Lucy, Thanks for posting this. If you take photos at this, email them to patchogue@patch.com andRead More we'll post it to News along with info on how people can donate if they could not make this event. Thanks.